Spending my last days

OMG!
I am absolutely spending my last days being a bachelorette~!

Quite few nights in Puasa month, I was spending time with my guy friends.
Talking, making jokes, playing cards.
It was fun and yet made me sad coz they'll be no more times like these.
We reminisce the time when I was still young and innocent.
Going out with them and never even thought of any bad things which might happen.
Which didn't happen, because they're very good guys anyway.

They brought up all my short scandals.
Which now are funny to me.
I will still say to the guys, "I know you're jealous coz now I'm getting married." or "Aw, you're just jealous coz you didn't get me."
But truth is, I think all my scandals are cool with it.
We're past our young and curious era. Haha.

Back in the days, I was so one of the guys, that I thought nothing when they put their arms around my shoulder, or kicked my butt, or commented about my body.
Now of course, they don't really do that.
Coz of the fact I'm already engaged and getting married.
I will not say I missed those days, coz I have to move forward.
But I am glad now it's part of my memories.

Not every girl can be in a "men" environment and have them feel that you too belong with them.
I achieved that. And I know they are missing me when I'm not there.
I thank you for all their support and kindness throughout our times together.
Gosh, I've been with some of them since primary school!

My times with them are phenomenal!
Lots of things that we went through...if I actually reveal all, it could never finish hehe.
But it was great.

It was one of the greatest times I've ever had.

Learning the process

In going through the engagement life, I would not say that it's all warm and fuzzy and happy and glittery.
In fact, it has its ups and downs.
It has its sea turmoils.
But we have always managed to pull it through just fine.

I have always set in my mind that I just have to go through this period happily and enjoy while it lasts.
And for me at least, this mindset works.
Sure we have had our rough times.
But it's the usual couple's quarrel.

People always come to me and say, "Hey, I don't want to get engaged too long"
or "I'm afraid it's going to end if I get engaged that long"
Come on...if you think like that even before you get engaged, then it is going to happen.

So girls, please enjoy the ships of your engagement life.
Seek for friends who can take you out and have fun while you are still single.
If you happen to get into a quarrel with him, treat it as something that just happen.

Sometimes, these quarrels that you have just meant to make you learn.
About yourself, about him.
And it makes him realize that he has a lot of responsibility over you.
And you have your own responsibility also.
If one is ego, the other must give-in.

I am still in the stage of learning.
Learning of giving in sometimes.
Learning in accepting him.
Learning in trusting him with all of my heart at all cost.
Learning to not always be in control.
Learning to let go of things that has past.
Learning not to bring up matters that hurts and that are in the past as well.

I am learning to fill myself with gratitude.
Because I believe that with this way, I will be more happy in my life.
I am blessed enough that I have a rooftop on my head, a family, a job.
But I am more blessed to have my fiance...
who accept me no matter what I do.

He is definitely the man that I want to marry,
that I want to live with the rest of my life,
that I could not live without,
and he is definitely THE Man who is going to be the father of my children.
I believe in him with all that he does,
and I know he loves me as much as I love him.